A Baby Adoption Story

In 1996 I met my love, Barbie, who became my wife in 1997. I admire a lot of things about her: her intelligence, her beauty, her energy level, her ability to get into something (like her business) and to really work hard at it, her ability to be a good parent. She has great tenderness towards the things/people she loves. With our darling Ava and our pets I see how affectionate she is to them, and I see her ability to give love and caring. Barbie gave up everything here in PA to spend two months down south when our little baby Ava was in the hospital; she breastfed Ava with the help of the hospital staff so that Ava could get the best start in life (yes, adoptive moms can breastfeed, can you believe it!?). She gives her ALL to Ava - I admire her gentleness and playfulness and just plain old capacity for love. All three of our pets are rescues and are now such an important part of our family; it was she who nursed them back to health and gave them the loving care they needed. She has a tremendous love and trust for me and a good confidence level, and I appreciate her so much for it. We consider ourselves not only to be husband and wife, but also each other’s best friend. Sometimes I think that our deep friendship is one of the absolute best assets of our marriage. I am so thankful that we met that day in 1996.

I enjoyed sharing a bit about my wife and I am so proud that she is the mother of my children.

Kind regards,

In Barbie's words:

I have never wanted a baby just to dress up in cute clothes; I have always wanted to be a *mother*! I want to be in this relationship with my children for life: I will be there for my children throughout all the good blessings, as well as all the challenges that life presents. I want to stay up all night when my children are not feeling well, I wish to be there to kiss the "boo-boos", I would like to be there on the first day of school, and throughout the heartaches of adolescence. I wish to always be there as a source of support, love, and guidance, all with the goal of helping my children transition into successful and happy adulthood.

I am in my mid-30's, I have dark blond hair, my eyes are hazel/green in color, I am 5’6” and weigh around 150 (okay, sometimes a little bit more, shhhhhh, don't tell anyone!). My complexion is medium, but I still have some of that blond “Dutch” look from my heritage.

I think that my personality comes across to others as cheerful, compassionate, and energetic. I believe my greatest strength is the love that I have to share. I am very fortunate that I have extra time and abilities, and so I do volunteer activities at our church, where I volunteer as an assisting minister to our pastor and help with the after-school youth program, and am just finishing up my year as church council President. I am friends with all of my neighbors and I am known for helping out with kids and pets when they are in need. Other strengths of mine: intelligence (from my father’s side), a determination to make things happen (such as starting my own business), and empathy for others. But a truly loving nature is really my best quality.

I was born in New York City, but spent 8 years living in Europe, in Brussels, Belgium, where I attended an international school. My best friends where Indian, French, Japanese, and American, so I was exposed to many cultures and I now have a special affinity for people who are "different" from me!

While growing up I loved sports (swimming, tennis, horseback riding, and track/cross-country especially) and I played music (flute and violin) which I did not love as much - I hated practicing. Of course, now I wish I had practiced more! I was the oldest child, and very serious as a child - I felt it was my "responsibility" to take care of my siblings. I have one younger sister, Susanne, and two younger brothers, Tommy and Chris. Our childhood together was very active, we were constantly doing things, and quite happy. My parents were still married when my dad passed this summer; my mom lives in Virginia.

I went to college in New York state (in the countryside, in Ithaca) and then went to graduate school in Virginia. Just as I was finishing my schooling I met the love of my life, Taddy! I moved to Pennsylvania so that he could keep the engineering job that he loves, and we settled to build our careers and our family. My career was going very well but as I focused more on my family, I realized that I wanted nothing more than to be a good mother - my work career was not nearly as important as my future mothering "career". So I began to look for a small business to start on the side that might allow me to work from home, part-time, in addition to being a stay-at-home mom.

After a few years, my tiny business, Sweet Scents LLC, became successful and I was able to hire a trusted friend, Laura, to run it for me. We now have additional employees (who make the candles) and with Laura running the business, I have cleared the way to be a stay-at-home mom. If I want to work from home, I have the ability to do so, but the business is flexible enough for many days to pass before I need to pay some attention to it! I am so proud of this accomplishment, because being a stay-at-home mom is the most important thing to myself and Tad. And with Ava, this flexibility has already been a Godsend - it allowed me to drop everything to be with her for 2 months. It also allows me to help family members at the drop of a hat; I am the only one in both families that can do this. I hope that this value will rub off on our children - that family is so very important, and that helping friends and family in need is a wonderful thing. Overcoming the barriers to being a stay-at-home mom were difficult – the most difficult part was explaining to family members that my MBA was *not* going waste just because I wasn’t using it in a high-powered job. My MBA is coming very useful in allowing me to stay at home, and it will help make me the smartest mommy on the block. J

P.S.: I wrote a short Autobiography in November of 2004 - you are welcome to read it here, if you are interested in some more about me... enjoy!

SOMETHING ABOUT BARBIE

In Tad's words:

In Barbie's words: